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| Oh-Seven, Oh-Seven: About a year ago we stood around a fire knowing you would be a memorable year. And in you came, '07. Storm after storm, each with a valuable piece of the puzzle flying around in it. You swept in beautifully. I have never relied on my heart and gut instinct this much in my life. I have never been painfully happier. Everything thing I gained are of such precious value to me. The same can be said of the things I lost. I have quickened my step and I feel that I might be turning the corner before you do, '07. There are a lot of things I have to say to '08 before we begin officially. But if you haven't glanced back at me yet, I want you to do so now. I want you to remember me as someone who tried his best. | | |
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Leap In, Leap Out:
How I ended up pacing the Atlantic City boardwalk isn't how I'm going to start this story. It's too puzzling and complicated to piece together for now. We'll begin with food. Food is always a good topic to get into - so we'll start with a jack n' ginger and a beef chow fun. The atmosphere was a nice getaway despite the sound of casino activity. This would've been a nice place, I thought. I stared at the mosaic-like artwork spread across the walls while I ate a meal big enough for two. When you get that full sometimes an ultralight dessert is all you need to complete the meal. The closest designated area was out on the freezing boardwalk.
I don't know why. I didn't need to be where I was. But then again, Dear Reader, that's not my mileage you see on the dashboard. Those are experience points. I was halfway done with dessert, contemplating the "why," when I stopped walking for no reason...well it was more of an automatic pause. The way one pauses at a crosswalk.
I looked to my left and caught eye contact with a man in his late twenties/early thirties as he began to approach me. He was bundled up to his neck and the frost he exhaled kept his glasses looking wet and blurry. Nevertheless, you could see the tourist look on his face. "Excuse me. Do these casinos connect?"
"Yeah they connect. I'm sure all of these do. Well, even if they don't it's all accesible from this boardwalk."
"Oh, okay. Do you know any good restaurants or places to eat around here? My wife is back there in the other casino. I'm looking around for a nice place to take her."
I agree, ladies, that the smarter thing to do, instead of walking outside in the freezing cold would be to call up or ask the front desk...or check online, I know, I know. But sometimes we don't mind doing it the hard way. A few of us like knowing that we can take care of our woman and find ways to make her happy despite the cold and shitty circumstances. Even if guy-stubborness is the circumstance. Don't worry...as you can see we ask for directions when you're not around.
"Ah, cool. I actually just came from a really nice spot down that way, through those doors. Not hard to miss."
The I-found-it smile flashed across his face as we headed back in the directions we came from. I've worn that smile plenty of times. They should have a good time...all he has left to do is lead her through the casinos. A man's sense of direction is all you need right? Good luck my friend.
So isn't this the part where I mysteriously teleport back? Where it's less confusing and I have a pretty lady waiting for me to call? Being here is disorienting and sleep sneaks up from around corners.
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| Desiderata: I am going to take the things I see as threats...and see them as challenges - as I once unknowingly did before. | | |
| Promiseland Security: From the third floor we looked down and waited for them to arrive. Newark Airport was an agenda's purgatory echoing with distorted announcements and the light voices of travellers. The gate we kept our attention on had a full line that stretched the length of the short dividers. About ten feet behind that line began another line with two female gate attendants checking the airline tickets. You had to go through this line before stepping into the first line with the dividers. Unfortunately, it slowly snaked down the corridor, clogging the entrance to the food court. People were frantically checking watches as they paced in inches. Others were unbelievingly walking the opposite direction as they trailed their way to the end of the line. Missing a flight is not fun, and the possibility of it grew into their worried, pissed-off faces. I spotted a priest, who looked to be in his mid-70's, walking up the line, toward the gate. He was squinting at his ticket the whole time, trying to decypher it's code of abbreviations and small numbers. His footsteps wandered in confusion. I felt bad for him. He looked lost and would soon find two thumbs pointing "back that-a-way." Surprisingly, he made his way past the two gate attendants (mumbling words and numbers to himself) and reached the back of the shorter line up front. I knew it was only a matter of time before the attendants would pull him out and direct him to the ever-growing back of the line...but they never noticed him. Shortly after, another passenger stepped behind the priest. She only remained a few seconds before being pulled off and booted to the back. They're gonna notice the priest as well and grab him too, I thought. They didn't even look at him twice. Carla's uncle laughed when I pointed it out to him and replied "That's divine intervention if I ever saw it!" I took in what I just saw and realized that was something I needed to see - God was taking care of someone. As lost and confused as the old priest was, he was led to where he needed to be at the right moment, totally oblivious of the obstacles that could have surely grounded him. So let me wander, Dear Reader. Let my confusion and apprehension not wear me down. Let me take it up on my shoulders and wander but knowing the whole time: I'm being led somewhere. It's somewhere I need to be. Following your thread in the Great Tapestry won't always be a straight line, but it will always lead you. I'll be around. S.H | | |
| I'm treading softly on these hours of sleep I should be taking advantage of. I'm flying to Vegas soon. But you're up, Dear Reader, and I haven't corresponded with you in a while miss you. Let's parlay, shall we? Look outside the third window...
Time will be migrating to the next year before we know it. I've been weathered this past year. But the insight, experience, and humbling I recieved is worth every ounce of hardship. Sometimes it's amazing to struggle through what God feels you are strong enough to handle. I've been calling "spot" for His help more than my soul has ever called before. Focusing on a mustard seed gives me a headache sometimes... You caught scent of it right?
It's her. I've always loved that smell she wears. I can be in the middle of an agrument and love that smell. I'm talking about my pretty lady sitting shot. Sometimes it's like learning how to dance and stepping on her feet. Sometimes it's like her rhyming and falling off beat. It's hard to move my feet when your eyes catch me like that. What's your excuse, sweetie?  I know..
The people I've been hanging out with most have been carrying their own crosses. We help each other when we can. But to all the friends I haven't talked with in a while: if you're going through some shit too, hold tight! The weather is just as crazy down here. Hold tight! You'll be fine. I'll see you on the other side of the storm. Places to go, Dear Reader. ~ S.H. | | |
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